Thursday, November 15th, 2007

Why MSN Adcenter Pisses Me Off

I apologize right now for the amount of rants over the last few days. We just have some really smart operators running around the Internet and somehow, someway my path just keeps crossing with them. Pay close attention though, I am going to teach you a couple of things to get past the MSN Inactive Keyword crap they seem to pull on me every other day on one of my campaigns.

So my ad rep, she loves me. She gets a call from me at least every 3 days for the last month. I have explained my background, that I am smart enough to optimize a landing page for the almighty Google’s relevancy formula and get a low minimum CPC but I for the life of me cannot understand why MSN makes keywords inactive for me. Furthermore, every time they get reactivated they have only last no longer than a week before they are inactive and I have to call her again. God bless heart, she will surely have someone else being my Rep or she might do something drastic to herself. Who knows, I do know that this woman can take a verbal beating. Yes, I know we should not talk down on women and I assure you that I don’t but I damn sure make it a point that the company she works with are COMPLETE BAFFOONS!

So here goes the conversation the other day. I am well aware that they have a different bot crawling pages for each country. The MSN bot is a sensitive little prick. If you want a misspelling as a keyword in your campaign, you damn well better have it on your page.

Ok now she tells me that my keywords on my US campaign are inactive because the Canadian MSN bot crawled the page and that the page I had optimized for the French-Canadian market was crawled by the US bot.


Allow me at this time to show you my silent reaction:

MSN IdiotsI couldn’t even speak. After about 2 minutes she asked if I was still there. I politely and calmly said “yes, still here”……then I added this –>”Are you”?

She said yes of course and continued to speak as if what she had just said had no ill effect on me whatsoever. I said “WAIT”, allowed me to back us up for a second. She said “OK”.

I said “you mean to tell me that a Canadian MSN bot crawled my US page and a US bot crawled my French-Canadian page. She said yes that is correct. I had it, so I said “What the f#ck are you people doing over there”, “does this make any f#cking sense to you whatsoever”?

She said she could understand my frustration and that she would activate my keywords. I said don’t bother, they will just get inactive in a few days and you and I will have to have one of these healthy talks. It’s almost like talking to a Pay Per Click Psychiatrist. Yet, one who didn’t go to school and study what they were doing. She said I have to understand that she is only a specialist. HAHA, your a specialist? You specialize in screwing over advertisers that are trying to spend thousands a month with you?

All that aside she told me that they are indeed facing a variety of vast issues at the moment. I said NAY, you been facing issues before you even got started. I don’t care how long it takes you to fix this, I care about you being my Rep and keeping my shit active. If I have to wire you some damn extra funds to keep you up a few hours more each night, I am happy to do it, just run my damn ads. Anyway, nothing is getting solved right away over there. Things have ran pretty smoothly the last couple of days though.

Bigger Issues…

Plain and simply MSN tells me that my landing page is not relevant. It’s not relevant for every single keyword I have in my ad group. So what do I do then? I call up the young lady and ask her what the f#ck her suggestion is and I shit you not, this is the reply I got…

It is  acceptable to add keywords to our pages, in the body of the page, in the same color as the page background! This supposedly helps their bots decide if the page is relevant to your keywords or not, just by the fact that the keywords in your campaign are present on your landing page.

 I tried telling her that keyword stuffing pages is considered a bad thing to the other search engines. She said she realized this but that it is perfectly fine with MSN. As a matter of fact, they encourage it. Put 300 keywords in your meta, a hidden DIV or even have them in the background as the same color so that they are hidden.

I find it so hard to believe that they are this far behind. I said ok, what happens when you guys (and girls) pull your heads out of your asses and finally figure out that people are placing advertisements that are NOT relevant just because they know they can game your bot?

The answer she replied with was…”We will deal with that when the time comes”.

Well, the time is now. I setup a second account with a family members name and information and I am now running tests to see if I can get away with this. If I can, there are seriously thousands if not millions to be made here if these yin-yangs can’t even get their bot to index and optimize properly.

For now though, I have been building a page for Google and Yahoo, and then one separate for MSN. Now some people may argue with me on this and say like “Does MSN even send that much traffic”? My simple reply is that if they didn’t, do you think I would make seperate landing pages just for their dumbass bot? There is serious money to be made with MSN, I know because when my damn ads actually get a chance to run, I get to see it. Keeping them alive is the problem. More to come as soon as I get more concrete information and testing done.

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15 Responses

November 15, 2007

…hehehehehe… absolutely hilarious… i am glad i subscribed to your rss… funny and resourceful…

good for you man… hehehehe…

November 15, 2007

Good for me?

While it may seem funny, if I didn’t have the capital to back up this damn shennigan they keep pulling, I just might have shot myself.

November 15, 2007

I agree… i know so much about PPC to make shitloads this month, but the fear of one mistake keeps me from starting with adwords…

Free SE traffic for me for NOW… i might have to collect enough capital to backup my self so i don’t shoot my self either… hehe…

MSN definitely has a lot of issues… they were never perfect… take the OS for example…

even with the all new Vista, there’s still hundreds of bugs being fixed every single day.. why the F***K do they release it without fixing all the issues first…

that’s who they are…

anyways, seriously man… you are hilarious…! hehehehe…

November 16, 2007

Apart from humour and getting straight to the point without a buncha bullshit and hype, this post–in and of itself–is a great lesson in SEO.

Might be interesting to check certain SERP’s for some keywords over the next few days.

Thanks for yet another good one.


November 18, 2007

I don’t know why stuff like this keeps taking me by surprise. All SEs (yes, even Google) seem to have something “not quite right.”

This, however, takes the cake. They encourage keyword stuffing. Wow…

My favorite line in the whole post, though:

“She said I have to understand that she is only a specialist.”

A bit like the guy flying your airplane saying, “Hey, I’m just the pilot.”

That’s the FRIKKIN’ point! lol

November 18, 2007


Dude when they told me that I nearly rolled over in my seat. Unfortunately, I have gone thru about a month of dealing with the ineffectiveness of not knowing this. To some people they may say “well it’s only one month” but NOV and DEC are my HEAVY months for promoting affiliate products, and now that it’s half over here in NOV, I find that I have to design a completely different page for MSN. Which is ok I guess, the ROI is incredible there, but that will surely go down as well, as word thru the grapevine is that their content network is in beta or soon to be.

It will be interesting to see what happens, but I can say with the recent Google Slap last week on outbound links to email and zip submits, it is a great network to help recover some of the campaigns I had to pause on G.

December 12, 2007

I can’t begin to thank you for posting this. It has helped me alot. I have managed to get 28 adgroups active and receiving traffic. The only problem I am having is getting good conversions using my own landing page. Getting people to click over to the affiliate page is causing me to have low conversions. I’m sure if I linked directly to the merchant page, my keywords will become inactive. Do you have any suggestions?

December 14, 2007

You can try framing it Frivvy. If that fails, then please email using the contact form ok. I will send you what I call the “end all bullshit solution” that I resort to when they start giving me the stick.

I rather not speak out loud about it though.

December 14, 2007

I’ll try it out. Thanx man!

March 25, 2008

Ruck, have you still been able to get away with keyword stuffing and MSN?

November 1, 2008

Awesome post filled with humor yet straight to the point!


December 11, 2008

I was never a fan of msn adcenter but I’m thinking to re-consider. Great post man.